1d10 things that happen when you inhale the ashes of the outer god you just killed

Thus began the Great OSR Weapons Race!

This table is in response to this table and this FB thread. And this table is a continuation.

Well then. These are 10 things that can happen to adventurers by inhaling the ashes that remain by killing an outré entity or returning it to its dimension.

Save vs poison or…

  1. You go all Uma Thurman. You need a heart restart1 or you will die in 10 minutes.
  2. You go all Uma Thurman (glitch version). You need a spiritual fix2 or you become a slime in 10 minutes.
  3. You go berserker and start (roll a die) odd: attacking, even: kissing whoever is closer to you. You calm down once you are subdued or there’s no one else to kill/kiss around.
  4. Your skin drops and the Krokodil3 that you always were is exposed. Permanently.
  5. You go all chamaleonic. At the beginning of an encounter, there’s a 1 in 6 chance you instantly shift shape to one of Bowie’s avatars. One with big hair, probably.
  6. Now you’re feeling zombified. Whenever you reach zero hit points, no matter what your system says, you die, you live again. Well, unlive. As a zombie. Roll a new character.
  7. Remember those weird and vivid dreams Stilton Cheese caused you? Well, this is the same, only worse, since it’s not a dream, since you are actually there!4
  8. A cat5 starts following you everywhere. He’s a little weird, her colors are not right, their sex is fluid like acid. No one else seems to notice it, though. Sometimes s/he talks to you.
  9. You start talking in a cut-up English (or whatever languages you speak). Listeners have to save vs magic to be able to understand your general message, but not the details. It lasts 1d4 hours.
  10. Nothing happens, you don’t feel anything strange, nothing at all. Nor your legs, nor your arms, nor your… wait? Are you a floating head!?6
click me

Notes

  1. Cure magic or something
  2. Remove curse or something
  3. Keep your character class. Gain natural AC 16 (or equivalent to chainmail; wearing real armor is impossible for you unless it’s custom made), natural weapon (bite) d10, and new race-as-class ability Hold Breath (you can hold breath under water for an hour). Remove all elven, dwarven, halfling, or any other non-human ability you have.
  4. It’s a good opportunity for the referee to dust off Carcosa or something.
  5. Bad Trip Cat. It doesn’t have stats, it doesn’t exist. Maybe it’s the adventurer’s inner self, spirit, personal jesus, moral consciousness.
  6. It’s up to the referee, of course.
When you inject drugs, Jesus Christ hurts more than you.

Author:

Chaos Magick-User, Vagabond, Dork

5 thoughts on “1d10 things that happen when you inhale the ashes of the outer god you just killed

    1. That’s the thing with these lists, always a mixed bag. The artwork is not mine, just to be clear. I guess I should add links (the cat has the link to the source).

      Like

  1. Hi Vagabundork!
    I’m trying to compile a “Book of online random tables”, including the “d66 things that happen when you inject your liquified henchmen”-table (with its author’s authorisation).
    Since I really like your response (and it really exemplifies the emulation and cross pollination of the blogosphere), I’d really like to include the table of this post in the book, too…
    Could you contact me at the email-address I used to post this comment, if you are interested?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi! I’ve been trying to email you but I can’t find your email adress. I wanted to thank you for your interest, and of course you can use this table. If you want to, you can email me to uneteronef at gmail dot com.

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