Thus began the Great OSR Weapons Race!
Well then. These are 10 things that can happen to adventurers by inhaling the ashes that remain by killing an outré entity or returning it to its dimension.
Save vs poison or…
- You go all Uma Thurman. You need a heart restart1 or you will die in 10 minutes.
- You go all Uma Thurman (glitch version). You need a spiritual fix2 or you become a slime in 10 minutes.
- You go berserker and start (roll a die) odd: attacking, even: kissing whoever is closer to you. You calm down once you are subdued or there’s no one else to kill/kiss around.
- Your skin drops and the Krokodil3 that you always were is exposed. Permanently.
- You go all chamaleonic. At the beginning of an encounter, there’s a 1 in 6 chance you instantly shift shape to one of Bowie’s avatars. One with big hair, probably.
- Now you’re feeling zombified. Whenever you reach zero hit points, no matter what your system says, you die, you live again. Well, unlive. As a zombie. Roll a new character.
- Remember those weird and vivid dreams Stilton Cheese caused you? Well, this is the same, only worse, since it’s not a dream, since you are actually there!4
- A cat5 starts following you everywhere. He’s a little weird, her colors are not right, their sex is fluid like acid. No one else seems to notice it, though. Sometimes s/he talks to you.
- You start talking in a cut-up English (or whatever languages you speak). Listeners have to save vs magic to be able to understand your general message, but not the details. It lasts 1d4 hours.
- Nothing happens, you don’t feel anything strange, nothing at all. Nor your legs, nor your arms, nor your… wait? Are you a floating head!?6
- Cure magic or something
- Remove curse or something
- Keep your character class. Gain natural AC 16 (or equivalent to chainmail; wearing real armor is impossible for you unless it’s custom made), natural weapon (bite) d10, and new race-as-class ability Hold Breath (you can hold breath under water for an hour). Remove all elven, dwarven, halfling, or any other non-human ability you have.
- It’s a good opportunity for the referee to dust off Carcosa or something.
- Bad Trip Cat. It doesn’t have stats, it doesn’t exist. Maybe it’s the adventurer’s inner self, spirit, personal jesus, moral consciousness.
- It’s up to the referee, of course.